Saturday, October 31, 2009
How A-Levels is making me feel these days...
Since I don't know when, I've been studying in school for even longer hours than a normal school day. I guess its the environment that makes it condusive for studying ba, but as time goes by, as A-levels come closer, I start to feel alot of things...
One obvious sign is my increasing paranoia. I am getting increasing...erm...nervous...daily. Going to school to study, in a bid to try to complete whatever I have set myself to do. But increasingly, I begin to doubt my learning. Yes its a scary fact I know. Everytime i try to memorise something, I will start to wonder if its really there, if its gonna remain there till A-levels, or will it just walk out on me. And from this, I try to make myself memorise harder. The only reason I can pin for this is...is fear too strong a word to use here...the gitters of A-levels coming. After studying for 2 years, I certainly wouldn't want to crash it now. But ya, its this paranoia that's getting to me. Another reason I can think of is the fact that I am pessimistic in nature, my close friends would know this. I always tend to see the bad side of things, as the years go by, I think it is because I am scared to raise my hopes too high, to feel that I would be able to get high grades, only to see otherwise when the results come. And sometimes, I get the feeling that its this lack of confidence that is causing my downfall...
Secondly, its the lack of family time I'm feeling. Having been in school, i practically treat my (I even typed it as "the" before this) home as just a place to sleep. I reach home bout 9.45, bath, study abit more then sleep. Wake up and school. I hardly get time to talk to anyone in my family. And the repercussions of this is getting...bad...
Let's just take today for example. Saturdays I would go home for lunch rather than eat out. Coming back to eat lunch, I start to wonder when was the last time I actually sat down with my family to eat a meal like that. That 1hr of lunch then was just pure great. Also, it appears my grandma is sick, and I don't know! I mean ya I know she hasn't been feeling well lately, but the fact that I didn't know she went to see doctor and nowadays have no appetite for anything is scaring me. Am I distanting myself unknowingly because of A-Levels? And somemore, went out with my family for dinner today at the new CityMall. Ya but half the time, my mind was econs, trying to complete my schedule for the day. I just could not concentrate, as the content kept swimming in my head. In the end, I had to convince myself that i will shift the schedule to sunday to complete it, then i can start to relax abit. How scary is that. Max sianz...
So now I am thinking, is it all worth the sacrifice? For A-Levels results, I am sacrificing this much...I know its I who I wanted to study in school, I am not blaming A-Levels, but its just that I am wondering if the A's, if I'm gonna get any, is worth this much. I just don't know...
Here's a thanks to those who've been encouraging me all this time and have been hearing me complain, I really appreciate it, I really do.
Here's a song that I feel is appropriate for this...enjoy with english lyrics...
Revealed on [8:11 AM]
Wednesday, October 14, 2009
Attack All Around (AAA), aka Triple A, is a new japanese band that i am loving now :)
Brief history: AAA is made up of background dancers/singers who used to be not in the limelight 1 might say. Avex got them together, and formed this really great band in 2005. Being professional background dancers, its certain that these people can certainly dance well. Made up of 7 people in total, i use to not see the point in bands with large numbers. But this band made me think otherwise, all can dance really well, and all sing superbly. Surprisingly, all their voices sound so good together :) Ok enough talk, action speaks, or rather sings, louder than words haha!
Climax Jump. One of their best concert pieces ever, in my opinion. So high!!!
Revealed on [6:59 AM]
Sunday, October 11, 2009
Inspired from the NE trip. While everyone was busy bridging at the grass patch above of Marina Barage, I was bored so i went to take photos (thks Ryan for lending me Jenika). Went to take photo of ppl playing kite, the water fountain below, and as usual I started to look for inspirational surroundings. Then i saw this,
A kite stuck in some antenna.So thoughts started flowing. Upon reaching the grass patch, 1st scene that one would come across if people flying kites. Here, on this modern structure, built to act as a water reservoir and for flood control, people are enjoying themselves with kites. I'm assuming that teens of our age, and subsequent generations to come, do not know how to even fly a kite( I admit i dun know how to fly 1 too). So isn't ironic that people are flying kites there.
Children of our generation are always associated techonology, xbox, playstation...the sorts. And its not really a false accusation. Toys of the past are now really things of the past, visible only in museums. Its what GP would term as a slippery slope. People demand better and better entertainment, more interaticivity, realistic grpahics and sound effects, somthing kites cannot provide. Ironic ah, isnt flying kite more realistic than using playing game can get???
So ya proven by the picture. If u hvnt notice, its shows a kite stuck amongst the antenna. I guess i dun hv to further explain the link. Jus tot it was an appropriate picture.
Revealed on [1:15 AM]
Wednesday, October 7, 2009
Dedicating this post to the recently released Halo 3 ODST, a game i sooo wanna get but because of A-Levels i cant (again...).
Earth, no loner as solitude as it used to be, now has covenant feet all over it. Events on the ring world Halo 2 has led them here, and now its a fight for the artifact, lying deep within the city, New Mombasa. The situation down on the soil is getting hot, its a fight they cant lose, a fight on their homeground that they must win. And now, the best is called into action...
The engines roar as Black Inforce Orbiter cruises amongst the clouds. In the Drop Bay, they wait in their pods for the launch command, while their commander give them a pre-fight preps. They have been hand-picked, intensively trained, posessing skills close to their genetically-enhanced superiors the Spartans, they are the Orbital DropShot Troopers(ODST), aka Helljumpers. Their purpose, to "jump" into hell to provide reinforcements to their comrades in the heat of battle.
Reg fiddled in his pod uncomfortably, eager to get into action. He heard the commander pod's door slam shut, meaning its time. The battle coordinator's voice rang thru the bay,"Launch is a go." The commander screamed into the comm,"Time's now. Giv em Hell!" Before Reg could reply, he heard the latch above his head went click, followed by the thousands of Gs acting on his body.
Pods flew out from the bottom of the Orbiter, like flies dotting the sky. Reg's pod start to shake, as it experiences friction with the atmosphere. The cooling agent on the outer surface of the pod sizzled in the heat. It was his first mission, but given the urgency of the situation, rookies are still soldiers. He peered out the visor infront of him, all the black pods are now a flary red, shooting downwards like stars. Suddenly, the pod infront of Reg exploded in a mass of blue flame. They are now helpless against the covenant anti-air fire, but that was part of what they are taught, they would be lucky if they were to even touch ground. Even so, sweat trikled down Reg's face. In the midst of the blue plasma bolts, Reg spotted the covenant mothership, its gleaming silver surface standing out in the orange horizon.
Suddenly, a blue ball appeared infront of it, and growing. The mothership was immediately engulfed in it, a slipstream jump. The covenant must have found what they wanted, and ran. But the blue ball kept expanding, something Reg was not prepared for. The ODSTs are in trouble. While too small to be able to slipstream jump, the distortion in space could throw them severely off course, apart from scrambling their systems. Reg could only watch in horror as the blue wave approached him. His systems immediately crackled dead upon impact, his pod sent in a spiral by the force. Reg was experiencing more Gs than he was ever prepared for. His last thought was of him wanting to throw up, before he blacked out.
Opening his eyes slowly, Reg found himself still inside his pod. He tugged open the safety belts, gave the pod door a hard punch, sending it crashing to the floor. He was disoriented, but he knew the foremost step to execute upon landing. He picked his silencer rifle, and ran towards the dark. A hovering sound soon came to ears, followed by sight of the covenant cruiser. Its starboard plasma cannons flared, releasing more than enough plasma charge on the pod. Reg crouched in the dark, seeing his pod disintegrating, had he not been fast, that would be him in it. He waited for the cruiser to slide off, before he stood up from his cover. He loaded his rifle with a satisfying click, and now his mission objectives had changed. He had to find his teammates, and survive.
Done. Yay it was fun typing it. I ssssoooooo wana play tis game!!! arrrhhh!!!!
Revealed on [3:29 AM]
Saturday, October 3, 2009
Considering i might be absent from sch for a few days, i think i might as well talk bout things here rather than have ppl asking me.
Microscopic Hematuria is a condition where there are minute blood traces in the urine, in such small amounts that it cannot be detected by the naked eye and onl by a dipstick. Only discovered i had it when i went for the NS check-up. So was a bit shock then, nvr encountered such problems before.
So i went home to check and did some enqiries. Found out that it is due to numerus causes (maybe a point mutation???haha), like hereditary, kidney stones etc...So i went to ask my dad, he said he used to have such a problem too, but then it jus subsided, so now he's fine. From that, i deduce mine is probably heriditary and hopefully i will turn-out to be like the case of my dad. But still, there's still this constant nagging thought in my head, what happens if its not, and its something more serious...
I also dun know, guess i would have to jus wait till the results are out and see what happens. Hope it wun affect me lots...i hope.
So if u guys dun see me in sch,at most 2 days of tests(mon n tue) and 1 day of collection of report(next tue), dun freak out.
Revealed on [7:07 AM]